"After awhile you start to get sick of a lot of things. you start to close yourself off from the world; you start to shun everyone out of your life. you just want to be left alone & you start to believe that the world really does hate you & no one really cares about you, & the only person you can really depend on is yourself. but really, you need to face the fact that this is reality. you can't automatically change what you want life to be. life's just life. it just happens. whatever happens, tends to happen for a reason. you can't exactly make life into something really happy, like it's some kind of switch, you know? there's no switch, no on or off button. you just gotta be a good girl & suck it up. if friends backstab you, it's okay, you'll meet new & better people, share new things, & probably gain some & lose some, as they say. in life, of course you're going to get your heart broken more then once, but it's okay because in each relationship you've had you've learned different things from your partner. they either taught you, helped you, or made you into a better person. each relationship you're in, you can fix the mistakes you had in the past relationships; you get a second chance. you'll meet many people who will inspire you, inspire you to be a better person, but in the end, it all adds up. are you willing to put all the tears, all the pain, all the hurt aside, & live life? make life as something really special, make it like it was your last day, never worry about tomorrow; worry about today. never let words get to you; words are cheap. actions speak a lot louder, you hear me?"
"I just feel the pain of you being gone, and I feel the pain of missing you. I can’t live with it, and I want to beg you on my knees, if I only knew that would make sense… but days turn into weeks and weeks turn into years, and I can’t win this fight. I wish I could turn back time, or at least bring you back here. ‘Cause it’s hard to fall asleep when I know that I’ll have to wake up without you."
"A boy sits in his room, with unseen tears running down his face. he sits on his bed and reaches under his pillow. he pulls out that hidden notebook with the pages filled. page by page, he rips them out - the memories of her... good and bad. the only person he ever loved. he kept tearing at the pages, trying to let the feelings go. trying to forget the girl who shattered his heart into pieces. not too far away from that boy's home sits a girl... all alone. with music blaring and tears unheard. her head is down; actions speak louder than words. her hair falls down, all over her face, so messed up... so misplaced. unheard tears streaming down her face, as if they'll never end. she understands that things will never be the same. she takes out her notebook and a pen. starting to write anything that comes to mind. she tries not to think about the boy because the only pain worse than having your heart broken... is breaking your own."
"Some days, I get such a sick feeling. Everything about my life seems so empty, so meaningless. Each minute holds something familiar, something I saw yesterday and the days before. Every second seems to drag on, and my heart feels so lonely. I feel so bored with my life and everything in it. and then other days, everything feels so great. The sky sings pretty songs of love and I can’t stop smiling. Everything I encounter gives me that same feeling of the warm sun on your skin after you’ve been cold so long. I have hope and everything is bright and new and so, lovely."
"I really miss you tonight. I miss talking to you, knowing that you get me. And every time I talk to someone else, it just reminds me how much they don't."
"I learned you can’t control who you love. When you love someone that you can’t get over, you’re only hurting yourself trying to move on, when you know you can’t. That person either makes you happy or you just can’t stand a chance in losing them."
"sometimes i just feel so empty and i don't know why. it's like this deep hole inside of me, and it keeps gettin bigger and bigger each day that goes by. i wish i could figure out why i feel like this. it's killing me. i want to feel something. i want to love someone. i want to dance in the rain. i can't do that feeling like this. i can't do anything with this hole inside of me. i may be alive, but i'm not living."
"But things have changed, and we both know it. no matter how hard we try to act like we used to, that same comfortable feeling we had before just isn’t there."
"Do you know what it's like to feel like absolute shit all the time, but having to act like you're fine? do you know what it's like to tell people nothing's wrong just because you don't have the time to tell them everything?"
This post is probably really crappy & i apologize.
I was in a really good mood today at school, until I got home.
Am i ever gonna be good enough for anybody?.
I'm just gonna lay in bed for the rest of the nght and cry myself to sleep.
Have a lovely night, darlin'.